Nathan's gone

This weekend has been a pretty bad one.
I can't say everything on here for now, but Nathan is going to be gone for a few months. I hate it. We found out Friday night. It's been a mind game. On and off over and over again. I've definitely shed a lot of tears. It's hard not having my other half with me. I'm not as independent as I'd like to be. I don't like knowing that I'll have to take care of everything while he's gone. It makes me nervous. I don't like to take charge of things because I'm always worried I'm going to screw things up. It's also hard not knowing where you husband is going, when he'll be back, when the next time you can talk to him is. I'm so worried right now. I know I need to sleep tonight (for the sake of being sane while taking care of Noah) but I don't see that happening. I have been running around all day long, cleaning, cooking, online shopping, watching movies, anything I can do to keep me busy. I'm already going crazy. I know people go through this all the time, it just sucks. SUCKS!
Also, my dad left on Thursday for Afghanistan. I have no idea how I am going to handle all the car care things we need to do with Nathan's VW bus and my car.
My friend Alex told me I should plan as many fun projects as I can. Sounds good. I already made a list of the things I want to do to the house.
I also plan on going to California for a few weeks and Texas for a few weeks. We were going to go back this summer anyways so I might as well go while I need support. I want everyone to meet Noah. I enjoy trips to America too.
And I still plan on going to on our vacation to Italy. My mom is trying to get my sister to come here so she can join us. I'd love that. I love my mom and sister so much, they help me get through a lot. They've been there through every break up and everytime I've been jobless and poor. :) Like I said, I'm not good at being independent.

On a different note, tomorrow I'm having a coffee date with some of my favorite girls in Germany. I'm glad that I have a great support system. They are all so much fun.
Next weekend is the shop morale party. We are doing an Irish theme.